And your current weight is....

beep....beep....beep....beep....beep....beep....GASP!  *Bob slaps his cheeks with both hands*

lol, we just watched Biggest Loser the other night.  If you haven't seen it, the above will seem crazy to you...

So, my value village scale says that I weigh...
158 pounds!

...huh?

I made Justin came over and check that I was reading that right.  He said it was right in between 157 and 158.  (From now on, I'm just going to round up, since this is a normal scale and not a digital scale like the wii.)

So on September 17th, I weighed 162.7.  I've lost almost 5 pounds since then?!

Believe me, you're as shocked as I am.  I was expecting a 5, possibly even a 10 pound weight gain, based on how I've been eating and how I see myself in the mirror.


After the disbelief went away, then the hope came in.  I didn't lose myself!  I'm still on track!  I can do this!  :)

Justin told me the other night when we were talking that he felt like I had lost the confidence in myself that he had seen before.  And I think he's right.  When I look in the mirror, I'm seeing someone who has gained a lot of weight again, and I'm not loving myself anymore.  I saw fat, fat, fat.  How sick is that?  The human brain is powerful, that's for sure.  Also just means I'm slightly crazy...lol.

The other day when we went hiking, I put on my bathing suit for the first time here--I felt gross.  And it made me grumpy, and self-conscious, and I didn't want to go out.  I've gotta learn to work through that.


Here's to new beginnings....again.  Here's to finally finishing this thing once and for all, and as Justin keeps saying, "Here's comes the two piece bikini!"  (I even shook my head as I typed that....lol.)