Easy Curves is Justin's favorite commercial. lol.

Sometimes I wish you could choose where you weight is shed from. I know you can't, but it would be great if my breasts would stop deflating and my thighs would instead. Haha. I guess beggers can't be choosers. But every time this commercial comes on, I've seriously considered purchasing one. I'm just put off that the bar is only 9.99 and then the shopping is 12.99. That doesn't make sense! But I did some google searches, and apparently they work. A bunch of different women attest to it, included older women who say gravity has taken a toll on their breasts, as well as women who have breast fed. Maybe when I get paid again... :)



And this one is just freakin' hilarious. Essentially the same thing, but more provocative...lol.

fat scars

I find myself standing in front of the mirror a lot lately, just starring at my body. No, I haven't become a narcissist, I'm just looking for the changes. A majority of the time I'm doing this, its usually in the morning after a shower. While I am noticing my belly slowly shrinking, and the creases in my stomach becoming less, I can't help but wonder if I will ever be okay with my body.

I know that sounds weird...let me explain. If you look at my stomach, I have stretch marks all around my belly button, kind of like a woman who has given birth. To me they are ugly, a reminder that I let myself get so out of control and so fat that my skin couldn't contain all the fat. They start close to my belly button, and kind of fan out a little way. I remember the first time one popped up, it was just a little one, no bigger than the length of my pinky fingernail, right next to my belly button. It was probably a year and a half ago, or maybe a little more than that. I was lingerie shopping with Jes, and saw it in the dressing room. I was devastated, seeing it there, because I knew they were permanent. From there, I don't remember seeing anymore until a couple of days before our Hawaii trip, I looked and they were all over my stomach. I felt helpless, and knew that no matter how much weight I had lost, I could never wear a bikini and fell good naked, because even if I was skinny, I would still have these...scars.

That's kind of what I think of when I see them. They're like scars, to remind me of who I once was, but they don't necessarily have to hold me back. I can still be skinny, and still feel great about my body. I know they'll fade...I have others on my sides from middle school that are hardly noticeable anymore. I just worry too much I guess.

Harry Potter HERE I COME!

Stepped on the scale this morning, and it saidddd....

-3.3 pounds.

YAY!!! I was so excited I started jumping around and laughing. And its not even because yeah, now I get to do see Harry Potter today, but its because I'm still on a role and lost 3 more pounds.

I've decided to set specific goals for myself. The first was to lose 10 pounds, which now I have!

The next, kind of like what they do in Weight Watchers, is to lose 10% of your starting weight, which for me would be 22.1 pounds. That's the next goal, and I'm already nearly half way there.

After that, the next big goal is to get to 175, because that would officially (according to the BMI), put me as an "overweight" individual and not an "obese" one. Obviously I'm getting a little ahead of myself, but it's nice to have goals set ahead of time, so I have something to look forward too.

Justin and I were just discussing how I've been steadily losing weight by doing the points and walking every night, but what would happen if I actually started really working out? I get out of class at noon, and Justin works until 4 or 5, leaving me with nothing really to do. So maybe I'll go work out for an hour or 2 after I get out of class to take up some of my time. I think its a great idea. :)

The soccer game is on now, and its usually about 2 hours, and then we're going to see Harry Potter today! Because I lost 3 pounds! WOO!

exciting!

So, back when Justin and I decided to get married (about a week before the day, haha), I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to find an inexpensive used dress when I got home to Vancouver, so just in case, I ordered a cute white sundress off ebay so as least I had something to wear in case I didn't find a real wedding dress. (which I did, thank god, but not the point).

Anyway, the dress I purchased was from Torrid, and was a size 16. When I went to put it on, it didn't fit. It was a pretty depressing moment for me that I was now a Torrid 18. I had meant to take the dress to Spanky's and consign it, but for some reason I forgot it both times I went there when I was home for the summer, so it ended up coming with and has hung in the closet since.

This morning, when I went to get dressed, I decided to put it on for the hell of it, AND IT FITS.

Just figured I'd share that little nugget of excitement that I had this morning. :)

come on 3 pounds.

Justin and I made a deal that if I lose 3 more pounds this week, we're going to go see the new Harry Potter movie. Come on 3 pounds! :)

I made delicious tilapia today. Put some seasoning on it and baked it in the oven for 10 minutes. Delicious, and only 2 points for a fillet. Awesome, especially with a side of angel hair pasta. mmmmmmm...

I love discovering new foods that I good to eat. If anyone has any good, low fat food ideas, send them my way! :)

yessss!!

Lost 3.1 pounds!! YAY! I'm so stoked.
Down to 213.4, which means 8 pounds altogether since I restarted. So excited.

This past week I was eating smarter, leaving more points not eaten at the end of the day. I switched to the spray butter, which has no fat or calories, compared to the 5 grams of fat in "lite" butter.

My goal this week is to eat more fruit between snacks. I did better with not snacking as much, and if I really needed to, I stuck to a box of raisins, or the random assortment of 100 calories packs that I have in the cupboard. (And most of them are chocolate of some sort, which is nice, because I have been having killer cravings for chocolate. haha.)

Today Justin and I are going to the water park. It's cute, and I can get more exercise by running up the stairs to the water slide! :)

mmm...meat!

Okay, I've discovered another favorite food...haha. Justin and I were poking around Dissmores looking for something to make for dinner, and we decided to have brinner (breakfast for dinner), and I picked up some turkey sausage. They are SOO good. Only 2 grams of fat per link, they're very doable for my diet. And they're so damn good. Haha, it may sound sad, but I just feel so meat deprived. I would stab someone for a steak. Haha. Anyways, turkey sausage=win.

I'm feeling good about my weigh-in tomorrow. I hope I see progress. I've been working really hard this week, and we've walked nearly everyday. And I walked home from class one of the days too! :)

See you tomorrow!

nada

Okay, nothing this week. Didn't lose, didn't gain. Kind of sucks, but not something that I wasn't expecting.

We ate out quite a few times, and even though I always picked the lowest calorie salad or turkey wrap, I still think it was too much. And we hardly walked the rest of the week. We either got home too late, or I had to do homework or study. It was a long week, and though I was sad to see my family go, it will be nice to have my apartment back to myself. Haha. :)

This week, back on track. No jamba juice, coffee, or fast food. More smart ones, salads, and my own home cooking. Though I'm glad I got to eat my grandma's fried rice. SO SO delicious. :)

See you next week!

home cookin' fooooddddd.

Yesterday I ate my grandma's fried rice. It was so delicious, but I had no idea how to count it points wise.

We went on a super intense, long walk last night to try to make up for it. And I'm being super good today, and the rest of yesterday.

Hopefully I still get good results on Saturday. Just need to make sure we walk the rest of the week to keep the exercise up.

negative!

Down 2.2 pounds.

I now weigh 216.5. It's nice. I was hoping that number would be a little bigger, but then again, that's just me being impatient. I'm really proud of myself, and I am excited to see more results.

I'm giving myself mini-goals, that kind of coincide with the weight watchers points. Right now, I eat 31 points a day based on my weight. My next goal is to get to 200, because that's when I drop down in number of points per day I get to eat.

I can't help but wonder if my the negative number would have been bigger this morning if I hadn't gone out last night. Its not a big deal, because I had a great time, but I really have no idea how many calories are in a sex on the beach. *shrugs* I haven't drank since I started, and haven't been out with anyone, so it was fun.

chocolattteeee.

There's nothing worse than being PMS-y and on a diet at the same time.

I want a snickers!